Is it necessary to prepare for a coaching session?

"I'm not up for coaching right now."

"I don't have any space for coaching right now."

From time to time, I hear statements like this uttered in both English and Japanese. The exact word used in Japanese goes, "I can't afford to have a coaching session right now". It is clear, however, that persons who said this did not mean to imply their financial situation. Instead, what they meant was that they did not have mental space to accommodate coaching in their busy day or simply didn't have 'time' for coaching.

Hearing a statement like that, I instantly think that it is perhaps high time for them to have a coaching conversation.

When do you feel that you don't have any (mental) 'space' in your daily life?

Here is my case.

The weekly schedule in the online calendar is filled with different colours, showing the week is full of activities. I've been thinking, "I want to do that", "I have to do that", and "Well, that one is also waiting for me to deal with", constantly. There is an important-looking appointment in a few days or weeks, and I feel overwhelmed as I have to make various preparations (including mental) for it, yet I don't know where to start.

Besides all these, there are other things to do such as cleaning the house and weeding the garden. Sometimes I write down a list of things I want to do and what I need to do, but after a while, I forget about it. Indeed, I do a lot of different things every day, but my priorities and where I should focus can become vague quite quickly.

This is how I feel when I don't have mental space.

I am with you to feel, on a day like this, that you are not up for coaching and that you have no time or space in your mind to think about coaching, let alone engage in a coaching conversation itself.

Even I, a coach, sometimes feel inclined to put off benefitting from a coaching session with my own coach, thinking, "well, I will contact my coach once I'm done with what I'm doing now and have more time."

However, it is precisely these moments when we can benefit from coaching most. Through coaching, we put into words what we really want to do now and why these things are important for us. Through this process, the priorities for us and the path toward the future we want will become clearer.

When I feel I don't have space for coaching, sometimes, I just jump to make an appointment with my coach. If I do that, then now I earnestly look forward to the session; I cannot even wait for it. It is because I know that I can reach some sort of breakthrough through coaching conversations.

One more thing. Coaching does not require 'preparation' in the sense of reading or writing something in advance and submitting it to the coach. You don't even have to pre-plan what you're going to say in a coaching conversation, especially when you feel there isn't any specific theme or topic you want to talk about.

To be honest, I used to ask my clients to prepare a topic they would like to talk about during the complimentary coaching interview, but I stopped it. Now I tell them they don't need to prepare anything. I've realised that it is enough to start a conversation with the question, "How are you feeling right now, coming to this session?"

Of course, if you have a topic that you want to talk about, by all means, please bring it to the session. Let's expand the conversation from there.

While deliberate preparations about topics to talk about are not necessary, I still recommend that you make sure to put yourself in a quiet environment where you can be alone. Sitting in a busy office room where your colleagues pass by or being in a session while taking care of a small child who needs your attention is perhaps not suitable for coaching. We do need an environment that is conducive to a quiet exploration of our inner feelings.

From the feeling of "no space, no time to spare!" to that of being well-organised and refreshed. Coaching has the power to make that simple transformation.

Are you wondering what coaching is and whether coaching is something for you? Please come to a coaching interview with me to explore these questions. The coaching interview is complimentary (free) and is up to 45 minutes. Click here to make a reservation for an online interview via Zoom. Please email me if you can't find a suitable date and time.